here;
stealing smiles.

just close your eyes

11:59 pm when i was really young, i used to believe that when i grew up, i wouldnt cry anymore. that crying was something that only young kids did. ive never seen an adult cry before then.

my dad cried at m grandfathers funeral,
then i realised that adults cried too.

and when i grew older, i thought that the older i grew, the more used to sadness and betrayal and being called stupid that it wouldnt matter, sooner or later.

and now im realising. adults hurt too. its just inside.
must be prety much like what im feeling now.
hurting inside.
everyone sees me as.
oh meeling is smiling. shes happy.
usually i am, but the pain is always there
it fades, day by day.
but itll never be gone.
and the older i grow,
the more things ill have to hurt about.
it matters still.
it hurts still.
i cry still.

yet, im still a kid inside sometimes.
and the kid is saying.
dont worry, everything will be okay.