here;
stealing smiles.

just close your eyes

10:36 pm i thought we would be like the old ladies i once saw in the supermarket.
the were old and wrinkled but they were close friends and having a whale of a time talking in the supermarket.
i guess its all over now.
why did you have to lie?
that is the worst thing, and theres also the fact that you dont like him and you know it.
you changed alot, i guess that'll make it easier to move on from you.
i thought we were sisters, and we would always be there for each other and share all our secrets.
hey you knew all of mine.
& you just totally betrayed my trust in you.
im sorry for calling you a desperate bitch.
i still think your desperate and sometimes you act like a bitch.
guess you didnt have to have that so directly thrown into your face.
you always told me that best friends come over boyfriends,
take your own words and eat them.
after two years of being such good friends;
always making each other laugh at the most impossible times, being able to comfortable ignore each other at all times, going through all our guy problems, comforting each other, talking about deep stuff that we wont talk to others about;
i guess its all over.
the anger has blown over and i wish i hadnt been so harsh.
its possible to fix it up i guess.
but it wont mean a thing to me if i do it.
even if you apologise perhaps it would mend,
but will it ever cover?
nothing'll be the same again & you know it.
i can never completely trust you,
i can never dare to.
all the secrets in between us will just blow over.
i doubt that youll stop keeping secrets anyway.

laughing so hard at random things that we roll on the floor at competitions.
making funny cracks about RIBT guys.
talking and complaining about our teammates.
sitting on the bus and promising that well keep holding on for each other.
talking about how good our parents are.
discussing all the guy secrets no one else would ever know.
comforting each other through all the guy crap.
thinking that we were going to be like dorlisa and ruiqi, totally cool and totally close to each other.
hugging each other and meeting up for lunch to talk about random things.

we were best friends.
im going to miss all that;
you mattered more to me than any guy,
i just wish i could say that you felt the same way.