here;
stealing smiles.

just close your eyes

8:21 pm im sorry i know this is retarded i mean, yo dont you've a xanga why're you posting here kinda thing. but sometimes im just like lawl, i dont know who reads my xanga actually and im pretty damn sure no one comes here so well. sometimes i need a time to be myself without a filter. reading back at all those posts previously sometiems make me feel stupid as ! , why did i dedicate that much time to one dude y'know. im sorry man, but sometimes some things in lfie just shouldnt be as important. but for what it's worth i think we had a good run of two years. something else to reflect upon would be my friendships. it's nice to see how far ive come from being the pariah in primary school to actually having a social life pretty damn close to normal. i've friends, i love them and i cross my fingers & toes that they love me too 8) sometimes though its pretty hard to just get whats on everyones mind though i mean i do get the comparisons some people make btwn fio and i, we're w each other all the time its hard not to compare. and sometimes i have to say my ego takes a pretty hard thrashing when im around her, thinking about what people say about my looks, my personality and i just get the impression that people do believe im just a watered down, less cheerful and agreeable version of her.

i am not.

i am my own person and im starting to love myself for who i am, learning to sift out the parts of me that makes me me, the parts of me that i dont like about me and to keep those that are of importance and bin those are not. but i am here, actually, just to really say this.

it's nice to see how i've come,
and
thanks God, i wouldn't have made it without you carrying me , half the way.